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Things to Look for in a Trainer
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Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) >  
Ver perfil   Traduzir para Traduzido (ver original)
 Mais opções 27 out, 19:20
Grupos de notícias: rec.pets.dogs.breeds, alt.pets.dogs.labrador, rec.pets.cats.health+behav, alt.recovery.aa, rec.pets.dogs.health, rec.pets.dogs.behavior
De: "Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ \) >" <Human_And_Animal_Behavior_Forensic_Sciences_Research_Laborat...@HotMail.Com>
Data: Tue, 27 Oct 2009 18:20:47 -0400
Local: Ter 27 out 2009 19:20
Assunto: Re: Things to Look for in a Trainer
HOWEDY Chardonnay9,

"Char" <chardonn...@earthlink.net> wrote in message

news:5didnX8w7oeqV0zXnZ2dnUVZ_v-dnZ2d@earthlink.com...

> What to Look for:
> A trainer who treats dogs and owners with respect

INDEED?

> A trainer who uses positive-reinforcement techniques

So called "positive-reinforcement" MEANS "ANY METHOD
which CEASES a behavior", includin JERKIN CHOKIN SHOCKIN
MUTILATIN an MURDERIN innocent defenseless dumb critters
an LYIN abHOWET IT <{}:~ ( >

> A trainer who uses a good fitting harness, the Gentle Leader head collar,
> Easy Walk Harness, or other non-choking, non-
> shocking training collars

That's a load of HOT DRY CRAP, Chardonnay9; the so
called "GENTLE LEADER" and "Halti's" AIN'T gentle an
they DON'T LEAD; they're FEAR FORCE and INTIMIDATION
 devices which can BREAK DOGS NECKS.

"Seem" you AIN'T been payin attention to my posts, Chardonnay9 <{}:~ ( >

> A trainer who teaches the owner what to do and how to do it

INDEED? You think the beast way to learn HOWE to pupperly
handle raise an train a critter is to stand at the side of a self-
puported EXXXPERT an learn to jerk choke an shock dogs
like HOWE they PREFER??

> Classes where dogs and owners are having fun

INDEED? An HOWE would WON know if a dog was havin
FUN or simply responding from anXXXIHOWESNESS?

> Classes where dogs and owners are learning new things

You mean like HOWE to put the GENTLE LEADER under the
dog's forelegs an THROW IT ASSOVERBACKWARDS *as per
the INSTRUCTIONS*, Chardonnay9??

You've sorely disappointed me <{}:~( >

• A trainer who uses a variety of non-aversive techniques

You mean like "MANAGEMENT" BRIBERY AVOIDANCE an
lockin dogs in boxes an IGNORING their CRIES, Chardonnay9??

> Training that is tailored to the individual dog

THAT'S the BIGGEST LOAD OF CRAP you've ever posted,
Chardonnay9; ALL dogs an children TRAIN up NEARLY
INSTANTLY (***as you've SEEN for yourself~!) accordin to
the MOST EFFECTIVE NON PHYSICAL SCIENTIFIC Pavlovian
and Ericksonian METHODS, not variably "tailored" ABUSES
 to suit the individual TRAINER'S NEED to HURT and INTIMIDATE.

Dog trainers who "TAILOR" methods to suit individual dogs
are MORONS who end up JERKIN CHOKIN SHOCKIN
MUTILATIN an MURDERIN innocent defenseless dumb
critters an LYIN abHOWET IT <{}:~ ( >

> A program that allows the dog to progress at its own speed
> and that doesn’t force him/her into situations where he/she isn’t
> comfortable

That's a other load of CRAP, Chardonnay9; dogs learn FAST
if you know HOWE to MOTIVATE an CONdition them usin
EFFECTIVE NON-PHYSICAL Pavlovian and Ericksonian
techniques AS TAUGHT in your own FREE COPY of The
Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard's 100% CONSISTENTLY
NEARLY INSTANTLY SUCCESSFUL FREE WWW Wits'
End Training Method Manual
http://www.freewebs.com/thesimplyamazingpuppywizard <{}:~ ) >

> A trainer who applies basic learning theory correctly

You mean "a trainer who applies basic learning THEORY 'correctly'?

Don't THEORY mean UNPROVEN SuppHOWESITIONS, Chardonnay9?:

Newsgroups: rec.pets.dogs.behavior
From: "TooCool" <larrym...@hotmail.com>
Date: Mon, 26 Jul 2004
Subject: "Learning Theory"-An Insult to Canines

 "Learning Theory"-An Insult to Canines
Classical and operant conditioning is founded in what
 is termed "learning theory".

The four rudimentary rules of "learning theory" are:

Something Good can start or be presented, so behavior
 increases = Positive Reinforcement (R+)

Something Good can end or be taken away, so behavior
 decreases = Negative Punishment (P-)

Something Bad can start or be presented, so behavior
decreases = Positive Punishment (P+)

Something Bad can end or be taken away, so behavior
 increases = Negative Reinforcement (R-)

Proponents of "learning theory" believe that no learning
can take place without reinforcement or punishment either
 positive or negative.

That is why they employ treats and force.

"Learning theory" is a flawed concept for evolutionarily
advanced species. Advanced species learn without any
external motivation. They are not automatons that merely
respond to stimuli. Their evolutionary survival has endowed
them with self motivated learning behavior.

 Canines, in particular, are curious, they love to learn and
they exhibit pride in what they have learned. They think-
they figure things out. They can invent games to play.

They can invent behaviors to drive you crazy.

They have emotions-they can be humorous and they can
be vindictive-their feelings can be hurt. They can suffer
terribly if you don't treat them with respect. They actively
 seek their environment for new things to learn.

They also learn from watching other animals and humans
 and they mimic their behavior (in the scientific literature this
 is termed allelomimetic behavior).

It is an insult to the intelligence of dogs and to their owners
 to employ operant conditioning (clicker training). Dogs are
not B.F. Skinner robots whose only capacity to learn stems
from the four rules of "learning theory".

Canines deserve treatment and training that is tailored to their
 nature. You can literally ruin your dog if your treatment and
 training does not respect their nature.

Please study the Puppy Wizard's Wits' End Training Method.
It is the only available method, of which I am aware, that is
based upon the true nature of canines. In his system, praise
is not used as a reinforcement or motivator, i.e., dogs are
not asked to work for praise.

--Larry

                    -------------------

Newsgroups: rec.pets.dogs.behavior
From: "TooCool" <larrym...@hotmail.com>
Date: Mon, 26 Jul 2004

Subject: Re: "Learning Theory"-An Insult to Canines

What you fail to understand is the concept of self generated,
self motivated behavior as opposed to reflex like behavior that
 is simply a response to a stimulus. It is double talk to refer to
 self generated behavior as a response to internally generated
stimuli. Thinking is not a response to any stimuli. It takes effort
 to think. It takes will power. It is a self generated, conscious
 process that operates independently of any reinforcement.

Thinking is initiated by the will of the thinker,
without stimulus-it is self generated.
B.F. Skinner behaviorism applied to thinking animals is a
 grotesque fraud. Its propagation as a model for learning
has inflicted untold damage upon thinking animals-especially
humans. It does not surprise me that those who endorse it do
 not consider themselves more evolutionarily advanced than
newts, because according to "learning theory", learning is
no different for a newt than it is for a human. But for thinking
 animals, the rules of "learning theory" are not their primary
mechanism for learning-their primary mechanism is a thinking
process and a thinking process is not a response to any stimuli
or reinforcement-it is self generated.

I cannot imagine how any enlightened mind can believe that
their knowledge was randomly gained from external/internal
stimuli. Anyone who has taken the effort to observe or to study
 the thinking skills of canines could never believe that their behavior
 results from random external/internal stimuli.

Have you never heard of the ingenious feats of thinking that
dogs have performed to save their owner's lives? The renowned
canine psychologist, Dr. Dare Miller, personally revealed to me
the events of two separate occasions when his dog exhibited
profound thinking skills to figure out a way to save his life; once
when he was trapped under the ice in a lake and another when
he was buried in an avalanche.

My statements on the use of praise have either been misunderstood
 or else they have been twisted to suit the detractor's intent.

The Puppy Wizard's Wits' End Training Method uses praise
extensively-it is integral to the method. But the method is
designed for thinking animals not B.F. Skinner robots who's
only learning mechanism would be through pain or bribe.

Thus, as I originally stated, praise is not used as reinforcement
 because the entire concept of "learning theory" is rejected as
an applicable model for thinking animals.

--Larry

                  --------------------

                        SEE??

> What to Avoid:

                 <snip IDIOCY>

> Look for a trainer who is certified.

INDEED?

ALL those "CERTIFICATION" organizations are SELF-SERVING
SCAMS an FRAUDS, Chardonnay9, puportrated on us by the
SAME SELF-SERVIN LYIN ANIMAL MURDERIN MENTAL
CASES who JERK CHOKE SHOCK BRIBE CRATE INTIMIDATE
SURGICALLY SEXUALLY MUTILATE an MURDER innocent
defenseless dumb critters an LIE abHOWET IT <{}:~ ( >

> Take time to visit various trainers.

                BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!

> Certification Council for Dog Trainers – CCPDT
> See http://www.ccpdt.org for more information

THAT'S dr. ian dumbar's SCAM organization, Chardonnay9;
he's a FRAUD, a COWARD a DOG ABUSER a LIAR and
INCOMPETENT dog trainer; he SUPPORTS JERKIN
CHOKIN SHOCKIN MUTILATIN an MURDERIN innocent
defenseless dumb critters AN LIES abHOWET IT <{}:~ ( >

Let's go directly to the IDIOCY you've bought into, hook, line an stinker:

http://animalalternatives.org/nss-folder/hiddenpdfsfolder/TrainerTips...

      > General Dog Training
      > Title Author
      > Don’t shoot the dog Karen Pryor

karen pryor MURDERED her own DEAD KAT on accHOWENTA
she COULDN'T TRAIN IT not to piss an shit in her stovetop~!

      > How To Teach New Dog Old Tricks Ian Dunbar

"Seem" dumbar can't train AGGRESSIVE dogs at least
accordin to the PARTICIPANTS in his "GRHOWEL" classes~!

      > The Culture Clash  Jean Donaldson

If all these SELF-PUPORTED EXXXPERTS could TRAIN ALL
dogs do you think they'd need to keep writin books to SELL us?

               <snip IDIOCY>

      > Dogs Behaving Badly Dr. Nicholas Dodman

              BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA!

All dr. dodman does is SELL ANTI-PSYCHOTIC medications
to CALM dogs he's locked in boxes an SHOCKED for ESCAPIN
their abusive HOWESES~!

      > About Dog Behaviour
      > Title Author
      > Dogs Ray and Lorna Coppinger
...

mais »


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Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) >  
Ver perfil   Traduzir para Traduzido (ver original)
 Mais opções 28 out, 13:09
Grupos de notícias: rec.pets.dogs.breeds, alt.pets.dogs.labrador, rec.pets.cats.health+behav, alt.recovery.aa, rec.pets.dogs.health, rec.pets.dogs.behavior
De: "Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ \) >" <Human_And_Animal_Behavior_Forensic_Sciences_Research_Laborat...@HotMail.Com>
Data: Wed, 28 Oct 2009 12:09:27 -0400
Local: Qua 28 out 2009 13:09
Assunto: Re: Things to Look for in a Trainer
HOWEDY i.m.lurker, you pathetic miserable stinkin
rotten lyin animal murderin punk thug coward active
acute chronic life-long INCURABLE Malignant
MaliciHOWES MENTAL CASE,

<i.m.lur...@invalid.com> wrote in message

news:g5v3d59r1repekbv3t1rqlvpq1l3hq2m5h@4ax.com...

> On Sun, 11 Oct 2009 08:06:17 -0400, Char <chardonn...@earthlink.net>
> wrote:

>>What to Avoid:
> Any trainer who thinks she has all the answers,

You mean a trainer who KNOWS HOWE to pupperly
handle, raise an train ALL critters, i.m.lurker?

> and who declares there's only one way to train a dog:

You mean besides CHOKIN SHOCKIN MUTILATIN an MURDERIN them?

> her way.

"Seem" Chardonnay9 relies on The Sincerely Incredibly
Freakin Insanely Simply Amazing, Majestic Grand Master
Puppy, Child, Pussy, Birdy, Goat, Ferret, Monkey, SpHOWES,
Horsey And Alcoholic / Psychotropic Anti-Psychotic Medications
 ABUSE Wizard's 100% CONSISTENTLY NEARLY INSTANTLY
SUCCESSFUL FREE WWW Wits' End Training METHODS <{}:~ ) >

> Avoid this kind of trainer like you would avoid someone with the flu.

Only a MENTAL PATIENT would fear EXXXPOSURE to the "flu" <{}:~ ( >

Apupriate nutrition will not permit the "flu" to manifest <{}'; ~ ) >

And only a lyin animal murderin punk thug coward active acute
chronic life-long INCURABLE Malignant MaliciHOWES MENTAL
 PATIENT would deny the FACTS as you've SEEN posted RIGHT
 HERE on The Sincerely Incredibly Freakin Insanely Simply Amazing,
Majestic Grand Master Puppy, Child, Pussy, Birdy, Goat, Ferret,
 Monkey, SpHOWES, Horsey And Alcoholic / Psychotropic Anti-
Psychotic Medications ABUSE Wizard's 100% CONSISTENTLY
 NEARLY INSTANTLY SUCCESSFUL FREE WWW Wits' End Training METHOD Manual
Forums <{}:~ ) >

      http://www.freewebs.com/thesimplyamazingpuppywizard

    A. S. Neill, Tthe Famous Founder of The Summerhill
   School, Used To Cure Delinquent Children Way Back
   In The 1950's By Paying Them For Every Time They
   Wet The Bed Or Broke A Pane Of Glass

           And Their Behaviour Would Stop,
                - As If By Magic.

      Sam Corson, Pavlov's Last Student Demonstrated At
      UofOH, That Rehabilitation Of Hyperactive Dogs Can
      Easily And Readily Be Done Using TLC. Tender Loving
      Care Is At The Root Of The Scientific Management Of
      Doggys.  <{) ; ~ ) >

      "...all the highest nervous activity, as it
      manifests itself in the conditional reflex,
      consists of a continual change of these three
      fundamental processes -- excitation, inhibition
      and disinhibition,"  Ivan P. Pavlov

      "Postitive emotions arising in connection
      with the perfection of a skill, irrespective
      of its pragmatic significance at a given
      moment, serve as the reinforcement. IOW,
      emotions, not outside rewards, are what
      reinforces any behavior," Ivan Pavlov.

  "All animals learn best through play." -- Konrad Lorenz

      "Despite Skinner's clear denunciation of "negative
      reinforcement" (1958) NEARLY EVER LEARNING THEORY
      model involves the USE OF PUNISHMENT. Of curse,
      Skinner has never to my knowledge, demonstrated
      HOWE we escape the phenomenon that an expected
      reward not received is experienced as a punishment
      and can produce extensive and persistent aggression
      (Azrin et al, 1966)."

The Embry Study:

"While some may find it strange that reprimands
might increase the chances of a child going into
the street, the literature on the experimental analysis
of behavior is replete with examples of how "attention
to inappropriate behavior" increases the chances of
more inappropriate behavior.

Thus, suggestions to parents that they talk to or reason
with their children about dashing into the street will
likely to have the opposite impact.

Reprimands do not punish unsafe behavior; they reward it."

Source:
"Reducing the Risk of Pedestrian Accidents to
Preschoolers by Parent Training and Symbolic
Modeling for Children: An Experimental Analysis
in the Natural Environment. Research Report
Number 2 of the Safe-Playing Project."

                    -------------------

      "The IMBECILITY of some of the claims for operant
      technique simply take the breath away. Lovas et al
      (1966) report a standard contingent reward /
      punishment procedure developing imitative speech
      in two severly disturbed non verbal schizophrenic
      boys. After twenty-six days the boys are reported
      to have been learning new words with alacrity.

           HOWEver, when REWARDS were moved to a
      delayed contingency the behavior and learning
      immediately deteriorated."

      "It is NO WONDER that the marked changes in
      deviant behavior of children can be achieved
      through brief, simple educative routines with
      their mothers which modify the mother's social
      behaviors shaping the child (Whaler, 1966). Some
      clinics have reported ELIMINATION ofthe need for
      child THERAPY through changing the clinical
      emphasis from clinical to parental HANDLING of
      the child (Szrynski 1965).

      A large number of cases improved sufficiently after
      preliminary contact with parents that NO treatment
      of children was required, and almost ALL cases SHOWE
      a remarkably shortened period for therapy. Quite severe
      cases of anorexia nervosa have been treated in own to
      five months by simply REPLACING the parents temporarily
      with EFFUSIVELY LOVING SUBSTITUTES (Groen, 1966)."

     APUPRIATE, EFFECTIVE, NON-PHYSICAL SCIENTIFIC
     methods of raisin handlin trainin an care AIN'T matters of
     OPINION or PREFERENCES; they're matters of SCIENCE
     and FACTS:

               Punishment ALWAYS Deranges Behavior.
           "NO!" Does NOT Have Any Behavioral Function
                                   EXCEPT
                      To DERANGE Behaviors.

From: "George von Hilsheimer, Ph.D." <drv...@mindspring.com>
To: "Jerry Howe" <theamazingpuppywiz...@mail.com>
Subject: Alleged Professors of Animal Behavior
Date: Fri, 19 Aug 2005

Dear Jerry,  I paged through some of the "dog business"
and was astonished at the low quality of opinions arising
from professors of behavior analysis.

I had the very great privilege of meeting Sam Corson
(Pavlov's last Ph.D. student) and his dogs at Ohio
University.  I even got to spend a night at Sam's house.

There is no question but that you are a spiritual brother
to Corson and to Pavlov, both of whom knew that the dog's
great capacity for love was the key to shaping doggie behavior.

Paradoxical reward and paradoxical fixing of attention are
both well documented Pavlovian techniques.  Even so humorless
a chap as B.F. Skinner taught students like the Breland's whose
"The Misbehavior of Organisms" demonstrate the utility of your
methods and their deep roots in scientific (as opposed to
commercial) psychology.

George von Hilsheimer, Ph.D., F.R.S.H.
you may find my resume in Who's Who in
Science and Technology

                             --------------

              From: TooCool (larrym...@hotmail.com)
              The Puppy Wizard's Wits End Training Method

               I have studied canine behavior and dog training
               for years. I have a huge library that covers
               every system of training.

               The Puppy Wizard's (Jerry Howe's) Wits' End
               Training Method is by far the most scientific,
               the most advanced, the kindest, the quickest
               and the most effective training method yet
               discovered.

               It is not an assortment of training tips and
               tricks; it is a logically consistent system.
               Every behavior problem and every obedience
               skill is treated in the same logically
               consistent manner.

               Please study his manual carefully. Please
               endeavor to understand the basis of his system
               and please follow his directions exactly. His
               manual is a masterpiece. It is dense with
               theory, with explanation, with detailed
               descriptions about why behavior problems occur
               and how their solution should be approached.

               One should not pick and choose from among his
               methods based upon what you personally like or
               dislike. His is not a bag of tricks but a
               complete and integrated system for not only
               training a dog but for raising a loving
               companion.

               When I once said to Jerry that his system
               creates for you the dog of your dreams, his
               response was that it produces for your dog the
               owner of his dreams.

               You see, Jerry has discovered that if you are
               gentle with your dog then he will be gentle
               with you, if you praise your dog every time he
               looks at you, then you will become the center
               of your dogs world, if you use Jerry's sound
               distraction with praise, then it takes
               just minutes-sometimes merely seconds-to train
               your dog to not misbehave (even in your
               absence) (Just 15 seconds this morning to train
               my 10 week old puppy to lie quietly and let me
               clip his nails).

               Using Jerry's scientific method (sound
               distraction / praise / alteration / variation)
               it takes just minutes to train you dog to
               respond to your commands.

               What a pleasure it was for me to see my 6 week
               old puppy running as fast has his wobbly little
               legs would carry him in response to my recall
               command-and he comes running every time I call
               no matter where we are or what he is doing.

               At ten weeks old now, my puppy never
...

mais »


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Char  
Ver perfil   Traduzir para Traduzido (ver original)
 Mais opções 28 out, 20:47
Grupos de notícias: rec.pets.dogs.breeds, alt.pets.dogs.labrador, rec.pets.cats.health+behav, alt.recovery.aa, rec.pets.dogs.health, rec.pets.dogs.behavior
De: Char <chardonn...@earthlink.net>
Data: Wed, 28 Oct 2009 19:47:58 -0400
Local: Qua 28 out 2009 20:47
Assunto: Re: Things to Look for in a Trainer
Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) > wrote:

> HOWEDY Chardonnay9,

> THAT'S the BIGGEST LOAD OF CRAP you've ever posted,
> Chardonnay9;

Well, it's about time you noticed it! LOL!

I don't agree with everything I post. Sometimes it's posted to start
conversation.

Gotcha!

Happy Halloween Jerry!


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Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) >  
Ver perfil   Traduzir para Traduzido (ver original)
 Mais opções 28 out, 23:52
Grupos de notícias: rec.pets.dogs.breeds, alt.pets.dogs.labrador, rec.pets.cats.health+behav, alt.recovery.aa, rec.pets.dogs.health, rec.pets.dogs.behavior
De: "Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ \) >" <Human_And_Animal_Behavior_Forensic_Sciences_Research_Laborat...@HotMail.Com>
Data: Wed, 28 Oct 2009 22:52:22 -0400
Local: Qua 28 out 2009 23:52
Assunto: Re: Things to Look for in a Trainer
HOWEDY Chardonnay9,

"Char" <chardonn...@earthlink.net> wrote in message

news:4LednaLUera0RXXXnZ2dnUVZ_rti4p2d@earthlink.com...

> Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) > wrote:
>> HOWEDY Chardonnay9,

>> THAT'S the BIGGEST LOAD OF CRAP you've ever posted,
>> Chardonnay9;

> Well, it's about time you noticed it! LOL!

I been waitin for some other ignorameHOWES to agree
 with the post so's I could JERRYIZE them <{}:~ ) >

HOWEver, the only MAGGOT I got was i.m.lurker, the dog
mutilatin murderin MENTAL CASE who PREFERS the so
called "whatever  works" method <{}:~ ( >

> I don't agree with everything I post.

I appreciate that.

> Sometimes it's posted to start conversation.

INDEEDY~!

> Gotcha!

We can always just make sumpthin up, can't we?

> Happy Halloween Jerry!

LIKEWIZE~!

Here's sumpthin we couldn't NEVER make up:

HOWEDY matthew, you pathetic miserable stinkin
rotten lyin animal murderin punk thug coward active
acute chronic life-long INCURABLE Malignant MaliciHOWES
MENTAL CASE,

Your kats groups are DOOMED, just like HOWE The
Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard DESTROYED the dog
lover's groups <{}:~ ) >

"Matthew" <iamacatslave...@proudtoserve.com> wrote in message

news:4adb300c$0$5085$9a6e19ea@unlimited.newshosting.com...

> "Char" <chardonn...@earthlink.net>

> <snipped for responding to twit>

> Can't believe morons still respond to him and not kill filed him

     "Seem" matthew is a other MENTAL CASE
     whom we been WARNING abHOWET the
     RISKS of GARBAGE commercial diets and
     veterinary apuprooved toxins:

From: "Matthew" <iamacatslave...@proudtoserve.com>
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 2009

Subject: Re: Ping >>Phil<< All the cats in the house are sick

 Remember the Pet Food recall. I lost My Spirit to those bastards
  I would check the web if they re eating canned or dry food to see
 if there is a recall

                        ------------------

                               SEE??

                BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!

Newsgroups: rec.pets.cats.health+behav
From: "Matthew" <iamacatslave...@proudtoserve.com>
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 2009

Subject: Re: Ping >>Phil<< All the cats in the house are sick

With me living in a high heat and humidity  state I would
 Look for mold
Are you sure they have not been poisoned  it could have
been a cleaning agent you used flea treatment

Check your water sources also<-----------

Call another vet ASAP tell them the symptoms

                      -----------------

                           SEE??

              BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!

Newsgroups: rec.pets.cats.health+behav
From: "Matthew" <iamacatslave...@proudtoserve.com>
Date: Wed, 7 Oct 2009

Subject: Re: Ping >>Phil<< All the cats in the house are sick

"cybercat" <cyberpu...@yahoo.com> wrote in message

news:vc4zm.225441$sC1.150730@newsfe17.iad...

> "John Ross Mc Master" <pussy...@cathouse.meow> wrote
>>>> Anyone have an idea?
> If they are indoor cats why do they need Revolution?

Cyber my cats are inside they get flea treatments also.
Fleas travel specially here in Florida they find there way
inside
                      --------------------

             BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!

      KUKOO~! KUKOO~! DING~! DING~!

On Sun, 17 May 2009
 "Matthew" <....@proudtoserve.com

AAADD
KNOW THE SYMPTOMS.....PLEASE READ!

Thank goodness there's a name for this disorder.
Somehow I feel better even though I have it!!

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. -
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder..

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway,
I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage,
I notice mail on the porch table that
I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table,
put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back
on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think,
since I'm going to be near the mailbox
when I take out the garbage anyway,
I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table,
and see that there is only one check left.
My extra checks are in my desk in the study,
so I go inside the house to my desk where
I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,
but first I need to push the Pepsi aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Pepsi is getting warm,
and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi,
a vase of flowers on the counter
catches my eye--they need water.

I put the Pepsi on the counter and
discover my reading glasses that
I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk,
but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,
fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.
Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV,
I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table,
so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,
but first I'll water the flowers...

I pour some water in the flowers,
but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table,
get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to
remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water,
there is still only 1 check in my check book,
I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today,
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day,
and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem,
and I'll try to get some help for it,
but first I'll check my e-mail....

Do me a favor.
Forward this message to everyone you know,
because I don't remember who the heck I've sent it to.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!

                -----------------------

           BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!
           BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!
           BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!

Newsgroups: rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
From: "Matthew" <iamacatslave...@proudtoserve.com>
Date: Sun, 11 Oct 2009
Subject: Re: Severe pain purrs please

Wish I had a way to help Mark  It is approaching almost a year since I
listened to my doctor and got the flue shot which turned into a severe case
that I ended up in the hospital with ripped abdominal muscles and back
muscles  from sneezing and coughing so hard.  I will never do that again

they gave me muscle relaxers and some type of pain killer in the hospital.
GO TO YOUR doctor Mark    you might be a man but  don't be a stupid
man and tough it out.  Sleep is more important

                ==================

NHOWE GO BACK TO SLEEP, you pathetic MENTAL PATIENT <{}'; ~ ) >

    http://www.freewebs.com/thesimplyamazingpuppywizard

                      -------------------

                            SEE?

              BWEEEAAAHAAAHAAA~!~!~!


    Responder    Responder ao autor    Encaminhar  
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Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) >  
Ver perfil   Traduzir para Traduzido (ver original)
 Mais opções 30 out, 11:45
Grupos de notícias: rec.pets.dogs.breeds, alt.pets.dogs.labrador, rec.pets.cats.health+behav, alt.recovery.aa, rec.pets.dogs.health, rec.pets.dogs.behavior
De: "Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ \) >" <Human_And_Animal_Behavior_Forensic_Sciences_Research_Laborat...@HotMail.Com>
Data: Fri, 30 Oct 2009 10:45:08 -0400
Local: Sex 30 out 2009 11:45
Assunto: Re: Things to Look for in a Trainer
HOWEDY Chardonnay9,

"Char" <chardonn...@earthlink.net> wrote in message

news:4LednaLUera0RXXXnZ2dnUVZ_rti4p2d@earthlink.com...

> Jerry Howe - The Simply Amazing Puppy Wizard <{}'; ~ ) > wrote:
>> HOWEDY Chardonnay9,
>> THAT'S the BIGGEST LOAD OF CRAP
>> you've ever posted, Chardonnay9;

> Well, it's about time you noticed it! LOL!

> I don't agree with everything I post. Sometimes
> it's posted to start conversation.

> Gotcha!

> Happy Halloween Jerry!

O.K., Chardonnay9~!

I'll PLAY with you and I'll stay ON TOPIC <{}';~ ) >

1st thing to LOOK for in a "trainer" is ANY trainer who
 NEEDS to "EVALUATE" a dog or behavior problem;
EFFECTIVE, SCIENTIFIC, NON-PHYSICAL Pavlovian
 and Ericksonian BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION TECHNIQUES
WORK on ALL critters -- JUST LIKE FREAKIN MAGICK <{}:~ ) >

CONsequently, if you run into a self-professed PROFESSIONAL
OBEDIENCE TRAINER who "NEEDS TO EVALUATE" your dog,
HE / SHE IS A FRAUD <{}:~ ) >

That's all for todays LESSON on PROFESSIONAL OBEDIECE trainers <{}:~ ) >


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